Sweet 17

How things have changed since i was a teenager? We never had mobile, computers, internet or any access to porn apart from what we might have found by mistake!

My first kiss was at the age of 12 and it was in a forest while on holiday.  Took me to the age of 17 before I actually got a BF and he was a back water boy called Ken. We had been dating a while and the deed was done after huge amounts of pernod and blackcurrent. Can’t say I actually remember the event but being classy as I was, I actually vomited on him during, nice! The only thing I do remember was the night after, the first showing of Michael Jackson’s Thriller video was aired on TV.  Things you remember eh?

My next encounter was a punk rocker who wore a dress and studded dog collar. Dad turned a shade of pink when he walked through the door. I was and still in my own way a rebel. Again not very memorable but at least it made my Dad mad. Oh how I liked to shock Dad.

For me being a teenager was a bloody horrid time and would never want to return back to those years. I went from being a fat, glasses, bad perm young teen to an all out full on punk/goth with a tendancy to wear very little, dye my hair all colours of the rainbow and wear it in a mohawk . Dad said I looked like a witch and he could post a letter through my lips they were that red! To this day, I still wear the same red lips stick. Bite me dad!!!!!

Being the era of punks and new romantics was great as everyone including men wore makeup. We had some of the best clubs in Manchester and everyone seemed to want to go out to shock. Men wore tight white leggings with black stiletto’s, women exposed their breasts in clubs and I saw my first nipple piercing in Cloud Nine. You couldn’t tell the difference between sexes so it was kind of a free for all. 🙂   I had my first female encounter then and although nice not really for me. Oh I do recall a night I was kicked out of a club for not only having a nose ring in but also for snogging said girl in the club.

I met a guy called Stuart who was lead singer in a band, wore tight leather pants and was the local heart throb. To say he was swit swoo was an understatement. I got to date him for a while, be a groupie and hang out in sound studio’s in Liverpool with the likes of joy division and echo and the bunny men. Sex with him was dull as he loved himself more and wasn’t very forth coming with foreplay. Actually, dont think he could even spell foreplay. Lovely to look at but very dim!!!!! Years later and I mean years later, I got to meet his daughter at a school I was temping at on the reception. He had an unusual surname and this kid walks in and gives me her name. Conversation goes a little like this:
Me- I once knew a guy called ******* he was a singer in a band.
Kid- Yep he is my Dad.
Me- Are you sure hes not your older brother?
Kid- No, hes my Dad.
Me- Boy do I feel old now.
Kid- huffs, pulls a face and walks off.

Later that day said kids Mother walks in to check me out. Boy did Stuart lower his standards. How the mighty fall.


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