My ex narc….

Narcissists are 3 year-olds trapped in an adult’s body. They lack the necessary epuipment to form functioning relationships: empathy, attachment, honesty, integrity, emotional bonding, and selflessness.

The emptiness howling inside every Narcissist compels them to search constantly for “the next best thing.” This is the only thing that saves (momentarily) the Narcissist from being confronted with the unrelenting shame and self-hatred they carry.

Check the signs… They are very apparent in your relationship?

I have put up with 5 years of lies, moods, lazyness, deceit, other women, tears, his tantrums, having to be the adult, being the bread winner, the bank, the cleaner, travel agent, home maker and much more.

It’s now over and it’s no contact for me to this sorry fat lazy ass of a slob.

I am now being slated , slandered and branded the baddy on social media and to whomever will listen and respond. So for now, I am playing poker with him for assets and personal effects. You thought you were better than me but you know what, your not. This grade A supply is better, smarter and will have my day. You will move to the next and good luck to her. You in the end will end up alone, lonely and depressed. All I can say is roll on that day. I am not sorry I left you, you deserved it. Too many chances wasted and fool me for giving you them.

Now off you pop, the door is right in front of you, don’t let it hit you on the way out.

Oh boy and they have all!

Narcissistic personality disorder — one of several types of personality disorders — is a mental condition in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance, a deep need for excessive attention and admiration, troubled relationships, and a lack of empathy for others. But behind this mask of extreme confidence lies a fragile self-esteem that’s vulnerable to the slightest criticism.

A narcissistic personality disorder causes problems in many areas of life, such as relationships, work, school or financial affairs. People with narcissistic personality disorder may be generally unhappy and disappointed when they’re not given the special favors or admiration they believe they deserve. They may find their relationships unfulfilling, and others may not enjoy being around them.
Treatment for narcissistic personality disorder centers around talk therapy (psychotherapy).
Signs and symptoms of narcissistic personality disorder and the severity of symptoms vary. People with the disorder can:
Have an exaggerated sense of self-importance Have a sense of entitlement and require constant, excessive admiration Expect to be recognized as superior even without achievements that warrant it Exaggerate achievements and talents Be preoccupied with fantasies about success, power, brilliance, beauty or the perfect mate Believe they are superior and can only associate with equally special people Monopolize conversations and belittle or look down on people they perceive as inferior Expect special favors and unquestioning compliance with their expectations Take advantage of others to get what they want Have an inability or unwillingness to recognize the needs and feelings of others Be envious of others and believe others envy them Behave in an arrogant or haughty manner, coming across as conceited, boastful and pretentious Insist on having the best of everything — for instance, the best car or office At the same time, people with narcissistic personality disorder have trouble handling anything they perceive as criticism, and they can:
Become impatient or angry when they don’t receive special treatment Have significant interpersonal problems and easily feel slighted React with rage or contempt and try to belittle the other person to make themselves appear superior Have difficulty regulating emotions and behavior Experience major problems dealing with stress and adapting to change Feel depressed and moody because they fall short of perfection Have secret feelings of insecurity, shame, vulnerability and humiliation.

So there you go, I can tick all the boxes for a certain individual who for now will remain nameless.

All I can say for all the lies that have been told, all those who took sides, blackend my name and reputation, shame on you!

My time will come and the truth will be told.

The truth is out there!

One day and hopefully not too far into the future, I will have my say. So for now I have to keep quiet, my dignity in tact, hold my head up high, do right by myself and the law and all will be revealed.

To those that know me, I thank you for standing by with support and kind words.

Those who have bad mouthed and disrespected me, your time will come. No one has a right to be so cruel to another human but then you obviously know no better and for that I pity you.

New year New start.

For 4 years I have been sharing my life, home, space and time with another person. Things have never been easy especially during the pandemic but it’s time to start the changes and move on.

Although we have lots of shared investments together I am making the steps to get my life in a new direction. Things will never change and I learned a great time ago, you can only change yourself not others.

There have been empty promises, broken expectations, tears, tantrums and begging but I am now on a count down.

In 6 months time, nothing will have changed apart from myself so onwards and upwards. No hard feelings just freedom from a toxic state and a chance to be happy.

Never again will I invest time, money and myself into another. I am positive this is the right direction and inner happiness is worth more to me than anything.

New year New start.

Looking back on here, I realise I have not done any blogging for over 12 months.

Covid came and changed everything for everyone.

I was working in London, living in Essex, minding my own business but that has all changed.

I am now a momma to two furbabies, MuuMuu and Bobby.

They have changed me completely and enhanced my love for them.

I now own a beautiful 1930’s house back up north and living near my family who I get to see regularly. This has made me extremely happy and content. My new job is good and paying well so all in all apart from the dreadful virus keeping us all isolated, it’s worked out well for me. I don’t want to sound flipant but it was hard work and determination that got me to this point. No lottery wins for me! 😜

The virus and 2020 changed the world. We lost a lot of good people in 2020 from covid, suicide, heart attacks and recently a car crash. I was always aware of how fragile life can be after my beloved Sam died but the year 2020 has been the toughest. I can’t say how 2021 will fair, if any better, but the one thing I have learned is patience, calm and try to accept what can’t be changed, go about your life the best you can and don’t get caught up in social media, lies, hate and conspiracy theories.

I am going to try to give more this year, be a better person and hope that we see an end to this for a new beginning. Will I have the vaccine, who knows? I don’t want to as I believe in holistic health rather than artificial but if it means I can travel again, I might have to have it. Of all the things that have happened this last 12 months, travel is the one thing I have missed the most. I have missed my brother and family in Thailand, my good friends in Japan and the chance to experience new adventures.

There is one thing I will try to change but tbh I don’t think it’s going to be easy but I will get advise. I might have to accept the issues for now and see where life takes this problem but for now I will keep going, loving my new home, life and furbabies.

To those reading this, try to have as best a year as you can, don’t be too hard on yourself, look after your mental and physical health. Both are very important and believe in humanity.

We are a resilient bunch who have been through much harder times and survived.

Oh and I will try to blog more.

Happy New year ❤️ 2021.


Charlie Chaplin lived 88 years
He left us 4 statements:
(1) Nothing is forever in this world, not even our problems.
(2) I love walking in the rain because no one can see my tears.
(3) The most lost day in life is the day we don’t laugh.
(4) Six best doctors in the world:

  1. The sun
  2. Rest
  3. Exercise
  4. Diet
  5. Self-respect
  6. Friends
    Stick to them at all stages of your life and enjoy a healthy life.
    If you see the moon, you will see the beauty of God.
    If you see the sun, you will see the power of God.
    If you see a mirror, you will see God’s best creation. So believe it.
    We are all tourists, God is our travel agent who has already identified our routes, bookings and destinations… trust Him and enjoy life.
    Life is just a journey…Therefore, live today!
    Tomorrow may never be.